Guarding the Key

In my last post, “Should We Give Someone the Key?” I spoke of giving a key to a neighbor to allow access to our home. There is a family, who does not live in our neighborhood, with whom we have exchanged keys. We have known and been involved in each other’s lives for more than 10 years. In many ways we are truly family with these close friends. We have driven to their home as needed and they have come to ours. The only hindrance is the 15 minute drive between our homes.  We can unquestionably count on each other, but would not call to impose for a simple task.

Some of the qualities that these friends possess include trustworthiness and a true love for us. They also have dogs and we have assisted each other and caring for these precious pets. We have also been available to help each other in emergency situations. There is a security in knowing that these precious friends have the ability to access our home and offer assistance when necessary. Our family strives to show the same trustworthiness and love for them. It would never occur to us to use the key to bring any harm or destruction to our friends or their property. That feeling is mutual. We carefully guard the keys to each other's homes.

When we choose to allow someone access to our lives, we must choose wisely. Just because someone says that they wish to help does not mean that they will guard our privacy or give good advice. “Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23 AMP) This applies to our thoughts and actions as well as those we submit our hearts to.

When we are the ones given the key to access someone’s inner life, it is imperative that we possess a strong character and guard this responsibility well. In the role of confidant, mentor or trusted friend we must be committed to keep and guard another’s heart with all vigilance. The Apostle Paul wrote, “Moreover, it is [essentially] required of stewards that a man should be found faithful [proving himself worthy of trust].” (1 Corinthians 4:2 AMP) Are we worthy?

 There are many characteristics of a trustworthy confidant. As the guardian of the key to a fellow believer’s heart, we must strive to develop these characteristics in our lives. Following is a list of three that I consider extremely important.

 The first characteristic is that we must be able and willing to keep confidence. Sharing private information with others is gossip even when done in the name of a prayer request. Sometimes additional help may be required, but this should be an agreed-upon person of authority. The sharing of information must always be with the knowledge of the person who opened her heart to us.

 Secondly a true partner will not simply offer their own opinions. We must seek the Father’s heart and guidance on every matter at hand. We must also allow the Holy Spirit to guide us in the words to use as we express counsel to another. The words He gives will bring life.

 We must also be willing to open up our lives and share strengths and weaknesses. A mutual vulnerability will garner a more open atmosphere for sharing. None of us are so mature in the Lord that we do not have areas that we are not seeking the Lord for improvement. True friendship is not as one-sided.

God has equipped each of us to reach out and help others who are in need. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of sympathy (pity and mercy) and the God [Who is the Source] of every comfort (consolation and encouragement), Who comforts (consoles and encourages) us in every trouble (calamity and affliction), so that we may also be able to comfort (console and encourage) those who are in any kind of trouble or distress, with the comfort (consolation and encouragement) with which we ourselves are comforted (consoled and encouraged) by God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4 AMP) We must both give and receive from each other. We can share from our past struggles.

Together we are stronger. “And though a man might prevail against him who is alone, two will withstand him. A threefold cord is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12 AMP) When we unite with Jesus Christ at the center we can overcome any problem and battle any enemy.

If you have been entrusted with the key to someone’s heart, guard it well. Seek the Lord and be the best friend that you can be.